8 SPOTS REMAINING!
Retreats are wonderful and a wonderful way to reconnect with true self and release some of the excess noise we create and draw into our lives. When I came across a 3-day silent retreat at a local Buddhist center, I signed right up. Here are some of the highlights of what I learned.
With the enhanced quiet, I was able to hear the wiser part of me.
Talking creates a lot of unnecessary noise. Sometimes we talk just for the sake of making noise. I found that when I stopped making it, I quickly developed a desire for quiet.
Typically for me, there’s constant opinions and chatter going on about the world around me, myself, my roles, my to-do lists, and so forth. When I became quiet for a prolonged period, that stuff started to fade away, and I recognized myself without it. I have to tell you, me without the bells and whistles is you. You are me. We are the same, and I like that.
It releases expectations.
When you are not expected to play a role or say something funny or interesting at just the right moment, a great sense of relief and joy can wash over you. I found myself perfectly content, sitting at a table, eating vegetarian meals with complete strangers, completely ignoring each other (except for a pass-the-salt gesture or an eyebrow that said, I need to scoot by). It was peaceful. I smiled the whole time.
Mediating for 4 hours a day has its ups and downs.
There were moments when I experienced pure bliss. The object of our meditations was the emptiness of the body and our attachments. There were moments I was transported. I went to some mystic beach and into a postcard I once saw, with tall, slender trees surrounded by emerald green leaves. I also dove into my body and released any tension I was holding in my body (very helpful for sitting cross-legged for hours). Then, on a few occasions, I dissolved. I became consciousness, I became love. I loved everyone in that room, across oceans, and all barriers were non-existent. All of my experiences had unfolded exactly the way they were meant to.
On the lower part of the roller coaster, I critiqued myself for forgetting my body is an illusion and everything around me is a projection. Urges to plan my week and multitask arose. I was able to relatively quickly surrender back into my relaxed state, which I’m very grateful for.
I didn’t give a shit what everyone thought of me.
It’s pretty awesome to be surrounded by Buddhists. They do some weird shit (lots of chanting, bowing heads to the floor, making altars, sound familiar, yogis?) so I was right at home sprawling my yoga mat out between meditation sessions and bending my body into a pretzel. I even noticed that when I did that, some of the other practitioners started stretching with me. It was pretty cool.
I also learned some other things like enhancing my compassion towards myself, how to draw myself out a negative chatter cycle quicker, and also that I have full capabilities to be accountable for my thinking. All of that said, I HIGHLY recommend a retreat for those who have never been on one.
